So do you ever get the feeling that the only person you have to blame for how things are is yourself? I sure do. And the fact of the matter is, you shouldn't. I mean, sure we all have things we regret and have put ourselves into situations that we knew were trouble. But hating yourself is not a good frame of mind. You get so angry with yourself that you tend to loose focus of you really are as a person and you start to project your negative attitudes onto others around you.
I mention this because running actually helps me to stop hating myself. I mean how in the world can you say, "Self you really suck," after running 6 miles or whatever. You can't. You feel totally awesome! So running has been a sort of self therapy if you will. And guess what it didn't cost me a thing.
The other day I got pretty down because I had to turn down a job that I thought would be awesome but didn't pay enough. The person actually called me back and offered me more because she wanted me as her employee. This felt awesome. It has been months since someone has actually told me they wanted me for an employee AND offered me the darn job. :)
I guess I am learning not to beat myself up about things that are out of my control and to remember that I make mistakes like everyone else. I feel like I can be my worst enemy and my harshest critic. I think that learning to actually like yourself goes a really, really long Way :)
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